Sunday, September 11, 2016

Start Of A New Week.

When I was younger, my weekend routine.
I wanted to do a least once a week post on Friday or Saturday to keep myself motivated. Didn't quite happen this time. We were suppose to have a 3 day weekend,  I worked Friday to get my total hours over forty. The Labor day holiday only paid me 8 hours and my workdays are normally ten hours, so by the end of the week, I'd be 2 hours short of a full forty.  Long story short I worked 8 hours this past Friday. Needless to say, I didn't make it Saturday either with a post. Decided to spend most of the day running around Omaha to a couple of flea markets. Today I spent a quiet Sunday observing the 15th anniversary of 9-11. And took my parents out to Sunday dinner.                            I was thinking how strange it's going to be going back to work on Monday. This past Friday was my good friend Dave W's last day at work, he retired after 37 years. I'm quite happy for him that he was able to retire as soon as he wanted. But I am sadden I won't see and talk to him every day like I used to.  On some level I think he likes me, I just don't know if he has the same feelings for me as I do for him. I noticed that whenever he sees me he has a smile comes to his face. I hope to find out for sure how he might feel about me by the end of the year. Even though Dave stopped working, he's still  going to be around town for a few more weeks before moving to his new house he had built down south, some 600 miles away. So if he does become a BFF, it's going to be a long distance relationship. He told me he might be back to visit his family for Thanksgiving, I urged him to swing by and see me then. If it hasn't happened by then, I wanted to tell him I how I really feel about him. With any luck, it will turn out for the best.    Now for a bit of irony, one of the small quirks of living in a small town. People will interact with one another that have no idea that they both know someone that you know. ( does that make sense?) Case in point, I found out the realtor that sold my friend Dave's house in town here is someone that I have a history with. I mentioned Gary before, Gary and I were seeing each other for a while. Then his friends and neighbors were asking who I was, how do we know each other?  It kind of freaked him out, and it was difficult to explain how we knew each other. Sooooo... he said to stop coming by, his friends and business associates might shun him, homophobic small midwestern town and all. I'm trying to break out and be myself, to a point. I have to limit myself here as well. But Gary wants to stay well into the closet. But if you talk to him in person you pretty quickly figure him out, I did! That's my rant of comings and goings on in a small town this post.
Missing My Friend Dave Already.
 

10 comments:

  1. I feel for you, the closet is a painful and confining place. I lost a good job when I came out, it hurt, I still have flashbacks of anger over it. After that, I resolved that I wouldn't have that happen again, I don't take a job unless my employer and colleagues are comfortable with who I am.

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    1. Hi David Thanks again for your kind comments. If this guy I'm trying to get to know better doesn't work out there's always plan G. You see I've already worked my way up through A thru F, haha.

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    1. Thanks AM, I thought of you when I found it. lol.

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  3. I feel for you too Randy. I lost two good jobs because I was out. It's not easy being out especially where you live, the heart of conservative America. Keep up putting your outreach to others you are interested in who are in the closet out of necessity (job security and not being harassed). I'm confident that you'll find a new BFF. That is what life is all about Randy. Never give up.
    Ron

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    1. Thanks very much Ron for your comments. I have friends I've known for some 20 years I haven't told about myself yet. Just waiting for the right time to spring it. Maybe they'll take it well maybe not. Where I work just talking with some co-workers a lot are very homophobic, so no.

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  4. Dating someone in the closet almost by definition makes you be in the same closet level as he is.

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    1. Hi Spo, And thanks. But being in a small town and in it people with small minds. I have to stay some what in the closet. Only being out to family and trusted friends. This other guy I was seeing Gary. Has a friend that came out to him, they're only out to each other. Will see what happens at my end.

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